Screw Perfection!!
Hey dudes....totally reading all the e-mails you sent me in response to my last newsletter. Tearing up and feeling so grateful for you all. Gives me strength to keep moving on, and sharing the parts of myself I've worked on hiding for all these years. I will respond to each of you! Might take a minute, just want to make sure I'm clear and open and have time and space to write back. I know y'all understand. And, if you still want to get on my e-mail list head on over to www.katlucas.com/subscribe or e-mail signup tab on this page. Should be on the left hand side under "Apps" or the bar at the top if you click on "more".
I'm so happy to read your comments and requests...for example Endri Qenanaj told me he misses my ukulele covers. I miss them too, and will definitely do my best to get some up! So, if there's anything you guys want me to write about, any questions, requests, etc. I'm totally down to do what I can. It's as much about you as it is about me! <3
Oh and I've been doing one-on-one coaching sessions as well if you didn't know already. Skype has been lovely, getting to connect with you all over the world. Music, life, inspiration, vocal, keys, guitar, writing, performance...I am totally open to sharing my knowledge with you, you just gotta ask! ;)
Of the last little while, I realized that I had this vision of "purity" for myself that was impossible to live up to. I had to be perfect, I had to be the best, I had to punish and be hard on myself to get better and achieve my goals. I still battle the idea that life has to be a "struggle". I'm learning that it can be fun, easy, light, wonderful.
No matter what surrounded me, I wasn't able to see the beauty or awesomeness in it, because I had my own dark filter on and would only focus on the things that were going wrong or that I needed to improve on. Then, I would be hard on myself for THIS and be angry at myself for not knowing better. And so... vicious cycle...downward spiral.
I just read a wonderful blog by my friend Jennifer Schramm, who is an amazing Equine Therapist. I've done sessions with her and wow, what an experience - highly recommend!. She talked about one of her horses not being able to see all the great things in her stall - the fresh water and hay, space to be on her own without the other horses trying to take her food, etc. because she was so focused on getting out - kicking, biting, digging holes etc. I could relate to this so much. I have developed habits of only seeing what needs to get done, what needs to get fixed, what I don't have yet, all the things I have to do. I rarely would step back and open my eyes and heart to what I do have, what I have accomplished, how far I've come. And, I would treat myself in a way I would never in a million years treat anyone else.
We are all our own worst critics. If we could see the way that other people see us, in all our beauty and awesomeness, we wouldn't be so stressed out about needing to change or being down on ourselves for not being a certain way or not accomplishing something else. I also read a great quote by the wonderful Mastin Kipp today on Instagram. He said, "What you desire is deliberately placed out of reach so that you can become the person it takes to obtain it". That totally hit me deep, and gave me an almost peaceful calm as my mind ran in circles trying to figure out how to put out this music, get everything done, record, tweak, write, paint, plan meetings, etc. I saw the blocks clearly that had been holding me back, and though they aren't yet completely gone, I am happy to be growing as a person, shedding the layers and old skin that I no longer need. Coming out as the brightest and shiniest version of myself and knowing that nothing can touch me.
Sending you all loads of love from over here... about to go for a walk/run and then excited to do my piece of art for the day from my 30 Day Challenge this month. I will post pics!!! Look forward to seeing yours as well.
xxx
Kat